Preparing for fostering

Becoming a foster carer is a life-changing journey, and while it’s incredibly rewarding, it’s natural to wonder when the “right time” is and how best to prepare. Whether you’re speaking with your partner, children, friends or extended family, open and honest conversations are key to building a strong support network around you.

Starting the Conversation

You don’t need special qualifications to become a foster carer, just the desire to offer a safe, loving and nurturing home. If you're aged 21 or over, legally able to work in the UK, and have space in your home, you can foster, regardless of your relationship status, gender, religion or background.

The application process usually takes around four to six months, during which time Lincolnshire Fostering Service will support you every step of the way. Because the journey can be emotional, having your friends and family on board can make a huge difference.

Talking to Your Partner (if you have one)

Fostering is a shared commitment for couples, so it’s important that both of you feel ready and aligned. Start by exploring key questions together:

• Do we have enough space in our home?
• How might this affect our existing children (if we have them)?
• Could one of us foster full-time or change our working hours?

Doing a little research beforehand can help you answer any questions they may have. If long-term fostering feels like a big step, you might want to explore short-term, emergency, or task-centred care to begin with.

It’s perfectly normal for your partner to need time to think it through. Honest conversations about both the challenges and rewards of fostering will help you move forward as a team.

Once you’re both ready, Lincolnshire Fostering Service will provide full support to prepare you as a couple, with training, guidance, and help finding the right match for your family.

Talking to Your Children

If you have children, their thoughts and feelings are a vital part of the journey. While fostering will bring changes, it can also be a deeply enriching experience for them. Here’s how to include them in the conversation:

• Explain that some children need somewhere where they can feel safe and loved
• Talk about how long a foster child might stay, from a few days to a few years
• Be honest about potential changes, like sharing toys or your time
• Encourage them to express their feelings, whether excited, worried or unsure
• If fostering a child with additional needs, explain any changes needed at home
• Set clear expectations around house rules to help everyone feel secure
• Prepare them for both the “hellos” and “goodbyes” that fostering involves

Let them know that their voice matters. We’ll also provide resources to support your whole family as you welcome a child into your home.

Talking to Friends and Extended Family

Telling friends and family about your decision to foster can feel daunting, but having their support can make all the difference. The earlier you start the conversation, the more time they’ll have to understand and prepare.

You might hear questions like:

• “When do you start?”
• “What made you want to foster?”
• “What kind of child will you care for?”

Answer honestly and clearly, and don’t be afraid to set boundaries. You may even want to involve trusted relatives, like grandparents or aunts and uncles, as part of your wider support network.

If you're nervous, let them know. Most people just want to help; you might just need to show them how.

Building a Strong Support Network

Fostering can be both joyful and challenging. A strong support network is essential. In addition to your fostering social worker, friends and family can offer emotional support, encouragement, and practical help.

We’ll always be there too, with a dedicated team, 24/7 out-of-hours support, and access to a warm, welcoming community of fellow carers.

Preparing Your Home and Garden

As part of your assessment, we’ll visit your home to ensure it’s safe and suitable for a child. It’s a great opportunity to take a fresh look, especially from a child’s perspective, and finish any small jobs that make your home safer, more practical, and more welcoming.

Think about safety in the home and garden: remove hazards, secure gates, and ensure you have age-appropriate furniture or equipment if needed.

Self-Reflection: Are You Ready?

As part of your application, we’ll explore your communication skills, life experiences, and ability to advocate for children. It helps to reflect on questions like:

• Are you organised, with good communication skills?
• Can you work well as part of a team?
• How do you handle stress?
• Why do you want to foster?
• Can you respect confidentiality and sensitive information?
• Do you have a reliable support system?
• Are you willing to talk about your childhood and past relationships?
• Can you support a child’s identity, beliefs, and cultural background?
• Are you open-minded, accepting, and able to challenge discrimination?
• Would you be comfortable supporting a child with additional needs?
• Can you build positive relationships with birth parents?

There are no “perfect” answers; we’re looking for people who are thoughtful, open, and ready to learn and grow.

“I was fostered and later adopted, so I know how important it is. My husband always knew it was something I wanted to do—and our two girls were proud to be part of it too. Fostering has made us stronger than ever.”